Gettin' Dunked!

My baptism - Photo by Kathryn McGrane

Oh hey, look what happened! What's that? I got baptised last Sunday!! Wooohooo yeah partayyy!! Seriously though, it was a great night. I'm still kind of on a high from it all. And this is the part where I write all about it. 

For those who don't know baptism is a kind of rite that's practiced in most churches where you get immersed in or sprinkled with water. The immersion symbolises a few things - the death and resurrection of Christ, and the washing away of our sins. The Baptists (the denomination I attend) believe that baptism is not essential for salvation, instead it is something you do out of obedience to God. The website christianbaptists.com describes it like this - 

"... salvation is something God does for us, while baptism is something we do for God. It is viewed like a wedding ring. The ring doesn’t make a person married, but it tells everyone around them that he married. The ring is the married person’s public profession of his love to a particular person. It is similar to a pledge of allegiance. Baptism is seen the same way by Baptists." I'm not good at explaining this stuff, so do some internet research if you're really curious! Or even better, Bible research. 

Still here after those explanations and stuff? Sweet! I'm sitting here right now wanting to write so much but hardly knowing what to say. Maybe I'll just say a bit of what I said on the night, when I told my testimony to the church (a nervous experience, but a good one).

Giving my testimony - Photo by Kathryn McGrane

I like to look at my life in a series of stages. Stage number 1 - my life before I was a Christian. I was pretty numb back then. I was a good kid, but I didn't understand people. I had no capacity for empathy. I liked being alone, I felt no need to be with other people. I just wasn't that emotional to be honest. I wasn't a big fan of God's either. I was brought up in a Christian family which was great, but I didn't take it too seriously, I just thought God was a big angry policeman in the sky. Until I was 14 anyway. Stage number 2 - after I became a Christian. I rediscovered God at an SU camp when I was 14 years old after hearing a talk about creation. I decided to take my faith seriously then, truly meaning it for the first time ever. After that my life changed, I changed, though I didn't realise for a long time how. God blessed me with the gift of emotions, though at the time it seemed more like a curse haha! I struggled for years, not understanding why I would get so depressed for months and months at a time. However, I kept going with little baby steps, and after a while I learnt more about why God made me that way and why I had changed like that, and I began to exercise control over my emotions. I haven't seriously struggled with them in well over a year now. This marks a new stage. Now that some of the main struggles of my early days as a Christian are behind me, it's time for new things. This marks stage number 3 - big things are coming. Over the past year or so I feel like God has been shaping me and preparing me for new things in my life. I am no longer held down by things like overwhelming depression or fear, obviously the capacity for them still exists in me, but I understand those emotions and know how to fight them now. Anyway, I think God has big things for me in store. So I decided to say yes to that. And the way I wanted to say yes was through baptism. It was my way of saying to God that I am prepared to do what he wants me to do. I am ready. 

And so I did it. I got prayed for by members of the church, I gave my testimony and then Karl and Ciara baptised me. It was an amazing night. This is where things start changing now. Since that night I have felt closer to God than I have in my whole life, I'm already seeing changes within me. I feel confident. I also felt the love and encouragement of so many people both within my church and not. There were a few friends there who came especially for the baptism, which I was so glad to see (shout out to Kathryn, Debbie and Simon, hooray!) I also felt encouragement from friends and family at home, who sent me lovely messages on Facebook and text etc. But most of all right now I'm grateful for my church friends, the girls at Potential. Without their constant support and encouragement, I don't think I would have had the confidence to get up there on Sunday. They have really blessed me and I see God through them all the time. When I signed up for Potential, I never ever expected to be part of such an amazing community, it has exceeded all expectations. I really feel part of something within it and I'm so grateful for that. Girls, if any of you are reading this, I love you all, thank you for being such great friends to me! I'm more grateful than you could know!!

If any of you are considering getting baptised, seriously, I'd really recommend doing it. I'm so glad I did! There's so much more I could probably write right now, but I realise I've already written an awful lot. If anyone wants to talk about anything I've said here more, feel free to drop me a line or something. 

Some stuff - 

• A video of the baptism itself 
• A song that was played that night, which will forever remind me of it
• The Bible verse given to me 

God bless

x

Arranged

 

Arranged (2007)

Okay I loved this film.

Recently I have been browsing Netflix's 'Faith and Spirituality' section to see if I could find any decent Christian films to watch. My search hadn't been very successful, if I'm honest, a lot of Christian films, (with a few exceptions) are cheap and cheesy, not really something I enjoy. In the end I gave up on trying to find a good Christian film and clicked on this one, Arranged, a story about two first year teachers, one Jewish, one Muslim, who become friends despite their cultural differences.

I will say it again - I loved this film! It focused a lot on the subject of arranged marriages, however it refreshingly showed both sides to the argument of whether arranged marriage is right or not. Arranged marriage is something I don't know anything about, so I was found learning about it really interesting, especially when it wasn't presented in a biased light. I really fell in love with the characters as they struggled to come to terms with what they were facing. I think you can learn a lot from this film. I would recommend it to all. I think I may have to watch it all over again just to enjoy it more!

8/10

Healing

"LORD my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me." - Psalm 30:2

It would seem that the girls at Potential rather enjoyed me doing a write up of last weeks events and so I have been asked by quite a few to carry on doing it. Well I guess that's not a bad idea! I'm not always the best at speaking but I do enjoy being able to get my thoughts down on paper (or laptop in this situation) as they just seem so much clearer there than floating about mid air. So after each week I will write up what we discussed and perhaps some things that happened and what I took from the night. Obviously because it is only me doing these write ups you'll be getting mostly my own opinions, so you'll just have to deal with that! Also I'm aware that things could get quite personal with this blog if I'm to write about these nights honestly. I'll just have to deal with that too, but testimony is a good thing so I shouldn't be afraid of being honest about myself. Things could head that direction in this post so I best just dive in the deep end!

Last night we read the other half of Acts 4, being verses 23 to 37 [click here to read]. This passage focused on the power of prayer, especially praying in the name of Jesus. We discussed our prayer lives, and we were all pretty open about the fact that we struggle with prayer. Praying's hard, man! People discussed their various methods of praying, for example some people used journals, some people prayed out loud, some stayed silent, some even prayed in tongues. One thing we all agreed on was that we all could do better. A lot of things hit home with me through out the night, but one thing to do with prayer hit home in particular. Now, one of the things I find hardest about living in Scotland is that I miss my friends at home a lot. It's quite hard to keep in contact sometimes, and when there are times when we go without speaking for a long time I get quite sad and want nothing more for them to just call me and we can have a catch up again because I miss them. We discussed tonight how this is what God feels about us, except so much more. He wants desperately for us to come and talk to him, to tell him everything, but we don't give him that. While I'm sitting in my room pining for conversations with my friends, God is wanting the exact same thing from me. From all of us! Makes you think, doesn't it? (Interestingly this is the second time this week God has pointed out that I'm being hypocritical, that's always fun haha). 

Now's the point where I use a personal story to try to convince you that this prayer thing is important (yaayyy honesty). There have been some things I have been struggling with unconsciously for years that have suddenly become conscious to me, and I have realised how much of a big issue they are, and it scared the crap out of me. I have been getting really stressed out and worried and angry and basically not good. To be honest I hadn't prayed much about it, because I was ashamed. My prayers were brief, mostly just "Help me God, I'm sorry God." However, I knew that this was an issue, and I could feel it bottling up, which is never a good thing, so I decided I wanted to talk about it with someone. I felt that this is what God wanted, so I was like okay God, I'll talk to someone then. I tried, and failed. I tried with a few people, either the conversation was sent other directions, or just went nowhere or never even happened in the first place. It was frustrating. But after the discussions last night, I got home and I thought I should probably just tell God everything, even though he already knows. For some reason I had left God as a last resort, wanting to talk to other people first. So I got home, sat on my bed, and decided to pray out loud to God, something I don't often do. As soon as I started I felt like God was saying "Yes Jo!! Finally you get it!!! The someone you need to talk to is me!!" It was very humbling, and it hit me just how much more I need to do this. God should be my first resort, not my last. Anyway, I kept praying, and I told him everything, all I felt, all I feared, all I wanted. When I finished I was blessed a sudden wave of peace and felt him say

"Jo... I will heal you." 

And that was it. He will heal me. I felt a lot better. So much better. I know I'm not there yet, but now I am confident I will get there. It's weird for me being open about this on the internet like this. It's pretty hard, but I like to hope that someone will get something out of it, and that makes it easier. So seriously, if you're reading this, pray, pray, pray like mad, it's so important! God wants you to talk to him!!

But let's move on from the intense stuff right now, and move on to intensely awesome stuff!! Speaking of healing, we saw something pretty darn cool tonight... healing!! (Never saw that coming, did ya?) Our lovely friend Keziah turned up last night with a complete lack of voice, couldn't speak at all, only whisper. That's never fun, so at the end of the night we prayed for her healing. The whole time we prayed I was thinking how cool it would be if when we finished praying it would immediately be fixed and she would just be like "hellooo!" again. Well... guess what happened. HECK YEAH SHE COULD SPEAK IMMEDIATELY!! Did I mention how important and awesome prayer was? Yeah. It's the best.

Pray guys. Pray.

Lars and the Real Girl

I've decided it might be cool to do some film reviews on this blog. I watch a lot of films so I probably won't post about every one, just the ones I feel are worthy of review. First on the list -

Lars and the Real Girl (2007) 

First of all, what else can I say but who ever thought a film that has a storyline revolving around a sex-doll could be such a sweet, innocent, heart-warming story? I won't give too much away for those of you who like to enjoy the mystery of what a film will bring but I will write a short synopsis. Lars Lindstrom, played wonderfully by Ryan Gosling, is a lovable introverted young man from a small Canadian town who shocks his brother (Gus) and sister-in-law (Karin) one day when he introduces them to his new girlfriend Bianca... who happens to be an anatomically correct sex-doll. However, as a contrast to the actual commercial purpose of the doll, Lars has created her to be a kind missionary, with whom he wants a loving and pure relationship with. Out of kindness his family goes along with his delusion, and soon the whole town has joined in, treating Bianca like a real human being. I really enjoyed this film. Watching the relationship between both Lars and Bianca, and the couple and the rest of the town, unfold. It was lovely seeing the whole community come together to support Lars through his delusions, despite what they originally thought of it. Just a lovely story all in all, definitely worth a watch.

To me this film is about many things -

• Tolerance. To me this film really preaches tolerance to those who are different to us. I particularly liked the fact that the a lot of the characters were members of a church together, and the pastor of this church was very welcoming to Bianca. I feel like not as many churches would be as kind as this, it is something we can learn from.
• Loneliness. A lot of the main characters seemed to suffer from loneliness, which I think is something we can all relate to. Each of the characters dealt with their loneliness in their own ways, obviously the most extreme being with Lars. An interesting thing to watch and think about.
• Childhood. There is a real sense that a lot of the characters are afraid to grow up. Many still have toys like action figures and teddy bears and Lars strives to understand what it feels like to be an adult.

Anyhoo I'm not so good at writing movie reviews, I'll get better with time. But for this one I will say definitely worth a watch, though it's probably not everyone's cup of tea. I quickly loved Gosling as Lars from the word go, and found all the other characters equally admirable.

I give it a solid 7/10

Indiscriminate Acts of Kindness

Foy Vance & The Ulster Orchestra - Indiscriminate Act of Kindness

Tonight I was hanging out with a few girls from my church, in a group we like to call Potential. When I hang out with these girls every Tuesday night I can expect a whole lot of laughs and friendship and good times, but also awesome God times, I can expect to be challenged. Tonight we studied Acts 4:1-22 (click for link to the passage). One of the things we focused on quite a lot through out the evening was the acts of kindness that the disciples were performing. This kindness was recognised by so many people to be something of God, and many came to faith through this. Yet, as the passage states, the disciples were ordinary men, no one of earthly importance. So if they do this, why can't we?

How amazing would it be if people could see our faith and our God through the things we do every day? It shouldn't be too much effort to perform little acts of kindness to those around us every day, yet do we do it that often? No, simply no we don't. We could be so much better at this! At Potential this week we have challenged ourselves to go beyond the call of duty, and show God's love to our friends, family and even strangers through the things we do for them, the way we treat them. You never know, this could lead them to the God who first loved was kind to us. And I have no doubt that this is what God wants of us, in fact I had an experience on the way home from Potential that made this pretty clear to me.

I was almost home, and the street I was on was still quite busy. Suddenly, out of nowhere, this woman came up to me and stopped me. She was crying, clearly upset and freaking out. She explained her situation and how she had just had an argument with her flatmate and so seemed to have no way home tonight. She asked for my help, quite distraught at her situation and also the fact that she had to ask for help. I was able to pay for her buses home, and she was extremely grateful, trying to work out a way she could somehow pay me back, but I didn't want that. It was a brief encounter, I don't know her name, she doesn't know mine, I only know she works on the street I live on. I do regret not talking to her more, I would have told her about the connection she had to what we were studying tonight. Who knows, maybe I'll see her again. It was strange, I was not the only one on that street, in fact there were a good few other people walking around, yet I was the one she came to. Maybe she saw something different, something approachable in me. I hope so. Basically, I felt like that encounter proved to me that God wants this from us, he wants our kindness, why else would he have immediately presented this situation to me?

So, I want to continue this, not just this week, but beyond. This is our calling, and I dare you to take up the challenge as well. Be kind. Expect nothing in return. Show them God. And in the words of Foy Vance up there, consider it an indiscriminate act of kindness. 

A New Blog.

This is me. 

There are some things you should know about me. On a serious note, I am a Christian, a follower of Christ, a Jesus-Freak if you will. I'm also a Photography & Film student at Napier University, Edinburgh. I like to mix these two facts together and I plan on making films about my faith. This blog will probably talk a lot about that. Another note - I've decided to start blogging again. Blogging is good. Sharing thoughts is good. Other things you should know about me? I like wearing silly hats. I am a karateka. I'm from Northern Ireland. I love the sea. I have awesome friends and family. I'm blessed. And I have no idea where this blog is going to go...